It's been 25 days since i last posted.. Isn't it? For this 25 days, we ended everything. I was sad very sad. Till now, i still can't accept the fact that we ain't tgt anymore. I fought so hard, to hold on to this rs. But he took seconds to break it.

If it's because of me contacting guys, think about you. You contacted girls. I forgave you once, twice and thrice. What about me? You sentence me to death. And when i go out late at night, just that once. Then what about you? You went out for several times. Did i break up with you? And again, you sentence me to death.

I tolerated you because i love you very much. But please, take care of my heart. My heart is fragile. So fragile that you can't even imagine. I fall out of love once. You picked me up, assuring me that you'll be the one. Assuring me that you won't hurt me. I believed you. But again and again, i'm hurt. When i broke down and cried, where are you? When i needed someone's shoulder to cry on, where are you? When i felt so hopeless in life, where are you again? I'm not that strong as you think i am. Who don't want to be doted, to be loved and to be cherished? I also want to be that girl that you love forever.

To grow old with you, to have children with you, to be by your side every morning and every night.

Years to build, seconds to break.. How vulnerable...

Gone with the wind, xoxo

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I'm back like finally.. Things starts to change a bit. My boy is actually treating me better than usual. I hope things like this really last. Because i love how the way it is now. To felt so blissful and happy.

That moment when i open up my mouth to tell him that i'll move out and then we'll separate, his reply is "ok", breaks my heart totally. As i'd never thought that he'd take it so easily. But luckily he held me back now. But for the future, i dont know anymore..

On a brighter note, friday is my last day of work here. Happy that i'm living this kind of working environment. Sad that i'm leaving with so much doubts and hate. Well, i guess things will be better when i leave, right?

Sometimes, i'm wondering.. Is my boy used to having me around or is it that he really loves me a lot that he doesn't want to let me go? Because if he really love me a lot and doesn't want to let me go, that's the happiness that i wanted. But if he's used to having me around, that's totally not the kind of happiness i wanted.

I guess, it takes time to find out whether he really love me a lot. Takes time to realise..

Gone with the wind, xoxo.

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Your attitude, makes it seems so hard to communicate with you.

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Slowly things are changing. It's never gonna be the same anymore. 

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